As we all know, Power Polls are silly- some of the voters don’t even watch any games! But people love lists, which is why Buzzfeed is a thing, so here’s Justin McIsaac’s TOP TEN! 

10. FOOTBALLFOOTBALLFOOTBALLFOOTBALL
Usually we get a slow drip of football back into our lives- a few college games, then the start of the HS season, then the NFL kicks off. Not this weekend! Thursday, Friday, Saturday, and Sunday, marriages were tested, touchdowns were scored, survivor pools were blown up, fantasy teams were cursed out, rivalries were renewed…. It was everything you wanted in a football weekend. Aside from…

9. TURNS OUT THEY PLAY TWO HALVES OF FOOTBALL NOW
Evidently the NFL competition committee created a new rule stating that games will last 60 minutes now, which was new to your New England Patriots. They couldn’t defend the run against Miami in the 2nd half, but the good news was that their Offensive line was shakier than the 26th move in a game of Jenga. Long time Pats fans will take solace in the fact that they crapped the bed in Week 1 in 2003, and went on to win the Super Bowl, but yikes.

8. RIP BIG 10
Nebraska needed a late score to beat McNeese State (it’s in Louisiana- I had to look it up), MSU got their clocked cleaned by Oregon. Ball St nearly upset Iowa until the Hawkeyes scored two  4th quarter TD’s. Ohio State got roughed up at home by Va. Tech. And of course, Michigan got KTFO’D by Dave’s Notre Dame Fighting Irish. I guess the Big 10 is a basketball conference now? (Although to be fair Penn State did beat Mighty Akron)

7. BLOWOUTS ALL OVER THE PLACE
Winnacunnet wiped out undermanned Dover. Bedford had their way with Memorial. Pelham smacked Con-Val around. Pinkerton was not very nice to Alvirne. And it went on like that! There were a BUNCH of games that were over at the half. A lack of parity this year, or just a quirk in the schedule? I guess we’re going to find out.

6. D2 HEAVYWEIGHTS COME OUT WITH HAYMAKERS
Most people have either Windham or Saint Thomas (or both) in the D2 Title game this year, and both the Jags and the Saints sent a message this weekend- Saint Thomas scored on their first play from Scrimmage and never looked back, winning 48-0 over Sanborn. Meanwhile Windham, despite having to wait until Sunday to play, made short work of Hollis-Brookline 56-0. I know it’s just Week 1, but there’s a a 32982374% chance one of these two are D2 champs.

5. MOTHER NATURE
We had about 27 minutes of hot weather this summer… until football season started. Just when everyone on your facebook feed was getting WAYYYYYY too excited for pumpkin spiced everything (more on that in a minute), it was Sauna time on the Gridiron. The game I had on WTSN Friday night, Portsmouth at Spaulding, saw Spaulding kids gets gassed in the first half, and Portsmouth kids hit the ground like it was Antietam, cramping up like crazy. I heard similar stories of cramp city from around the state.  Be better, Mother Nature.

4. STOP WITH THE PUMPKIN SPICED OBSESSION ABOUT EVERYTHING 
Listen. Pumpkins are gross. When my wife and kids carve pumpkins, I leave the room. Pumpkin beer is the most vile liquid ever conceived by man.  If someone offered you a piece of pumpkin to eat, you’d slap them, and rightfully so. People that claim to like pumpkin spiced coffee/donuts/whatever are actually fans of nutmeg and cinnamon. Enough with bowing down to Big Pumpkin!

3. CONNOR DICESARE’S ARM
If memory serves, “Con-Dice” made one emergency start last year, (it might have been when he was a Sophomore) but Friday night on the road in Portsmouth’s first game in D1 since 2005 was a different animal. DiCesare carved up Spaulding’s man to man coverage, leading the Clippers to a 20-0 halftime lead over my alma matter. After Spaulding closed the gap to 20-14 in the 3rd, DiCesare checked out of the called play, and into a long bomb to Joey Auger (who had a hell of a night)  to strike back and push the lead to 26-14, which was the final score. 3 TD passes on the night for Con-Dice, and a whoooooooole lot of headaches to come for D1 defensive coaches.

2. HEY, WHERE’S D3?
Division 3 starts their season a week late this year, but that’s not the whole story- D3 teams had to start PRACTICING a week later as well, which I know threw a monkey wrench into at least one team’s plans to head away for a week of team building . There was a lot of football this weekend, but without the Bow’s, Stevens’, and Somersworth’s of the world playing, it diiiiiiiidn’t quite feel whole.

1. DAVE HALEY’S CLEANSE
Dave Haley, our leader, might be a little cranky this week- he’s not eating. In fact, as far as I know, all he’s consuming is hot water with Lemon. Determined to become the Robin Quivers of NH Sportspage, Dave is going to great lengths to get, in a way, healthy. Can a fact finding mission to Guatemala be far behind?

ALSO RECEIVEING VOTES: 
Londonderry shocks BG, Goffstown gives Concord everything they can handle, Pinkerton is an absolute wagon, Cleveland’s punter getting karate kicked in the face, ESPN’s fantasy site going down

 Follow Justin McIsaac on Twitter at .@Justin_McIsaac